funny things once said:

• in grade 8 i did a power point presentation on “whooping cough” and my opening slide was a photo of whoopi goldberg coughing and i was the only person who laughed at it and i couldnt start the presentation for like five minutes because i was laughing too hard at my own joke

 

• when i die scatter my ashes in the milo factory so i can live forever in the bodies of small australian children

• my little cousin started stroking my cheek and i thought it was so sweet until he came up real close to my ear and whispered “i’m putting crumbs on you so ants will eat you in your sleep

• if they make another step up movie, they are going to fucking step off a fucking cliff

• what do you mean you can’t hang out i showered for this 

• “may” contain nudity? either it does or it doesn’t don’t waste my fucking time

• personally i feel like romeo and juliet could have handled the situation better

• saying you don’t want gay people around your child because they might turn gay is like saying you don’t want black people around your child because they might become black

• “Swearing is unattractive” I’m not attractive anyway so fuck off

• i was washing dishes the other day and i got so into it i felt like a 50s housewife and halfway through i became overwhelmed with the thought that i had to cook dinner and pick the kids up from school but then i remembered that i’m a 19 year old gay boy

• when attractive people compliment me on things i get suspicious because remember when regina george complimented that one girl on her skirt

• jesus didnt have a thigh gap so why should i

• Teacher: If you have 10 chocolate cakes and someone asks for 2, how many do you have left? Me: 10

• being famous must be so hard they probably have to shave their legs like everyday

fuck i love tumblr people come up with the funniest shit.. hope you had a laugh i know i did! http://rubymackenzie.tumblr.com/

ruby xxx